Have you ever hit Send on a crucial mail, leaned back, and thought, Ahhhh—done! Well, here’s a tip your college business professor may have forgotten to mention: Results are only half the story.
You may be thinking, Wait a minute—what about all the work skills I used to create that incredibly designed pitch?
Fair enough. You may already rely on work skills such as communicating, collaborating, and problem-solving. But have you considered whether you are simultaneously producing strong, sustainable alliances?
For instance, we’ve all known people who believe they communicate well. In practice, however, they accidentally undercut their cred with a stream of frantic emails, instant messages, and texts. Then there’s the person whose ideal solution falls short because they forgot to dig deep and hit on concepts benefiting everyone. But sidestepping these mistakes is simple: Just balance What you do with How you get it done. Let’s meet someone who fell hard for the myth that they only had to GSD to thrive.
Diego stood in the office kitchen, lost in thought as his coffee brewed. “Hey—you’re a million miles away. Is everything all right?” I asked.
“I got another red bang mail from my favorite law firm,” Diego said sarcastically. “That makes four threatening letters this year. And the year has six months to go!”
I wasn’t sure what to say. Diego is one of the best negotiators I know. In fact, I had never known him to lose a deal.
“I’m the first to admit that my clients aren’t the easiest group. They have a certain worldview, so they give me a long list of Go Do’s. But that’s their prerogative,” he said, shrugging his shoulders.
“And let me guess—you’re so awesome that you find a way to check all twenty Go Do’s off the list,” I joked.
“Exactly!” Diego laughed. Then, I could see a light bulb go on in his head. “Wait a minute—maybe checking all twenty off the list is the problem. Hmmm…I need to get the team to pivot and start thinking long-term. We may have just said, ‘Our way or the highway,’ for the last time.”
In the January series, Straight Talk about Soft Skills, we’re discussing three common misconceptions about soft skills (also known as work skills or people skills). The case study busts the one-dimensional myth that deliverables are the only things that count. The negotiator thought closing deals—even if that required being pushy or throwing out an ultimatum or two—made his team successful. But a string of threatening letters meant that the team watched their success crumble faster than a dragon burning down the house on “Game of Thrones.” Suddenly, supposed partners were out to settle old scores that happened in a tense negotiation room.
The straight talk about soft skills is that relationships are the other half, and most important, part of the game. You can avoid the negotiating team’s error by taking an intentional approach to how you execute. If being intentional sounds too touchy-feely, reframe it as goal setting. A recent study in the Harvard Business Review confirmed the value of strategy which is authentic and ethical, calling it a differentiator that will “ignite an upward spiral for your career.”
So, before you hit Send on that big mail, ask yourself whether you’re honing partnerships as much as your presentation. Swap forcing for using How tactics—like being adaptable, creative, and making wise choices. By using people skills, you’ll produce quality work product as well as:
Make this the year where you replace desperate moves and pointless fights with true success. Ace soft skills by investing in relationships.
Are you ready to take your people skills to the next level? Skill up for less than the price of a taquito with my new book at Amazon, Soft Skills Basics in a Flash.