I used to have a boss that always posed the same question after I whined several times: “This <thing> keeps happening. What do you think you could do to get in front of it?” I thought I’d get some tea and sympathy at my 1:1, but I only got some marching orders!
My manager had x-ray vision for what I couldn’t see when I was up in the feels. And that was that repetitive tales were more than storytelling—they signaled that a pattern was afoot.
In the March series, 4 Simple Ways to Excel at High Agency, we’re discussing actionable principles to help you boss up. Last week we talked about showing up, and principle #2 is seeing patterns. The trouble with repeating behaviors is that they usually display one puzzle piece at a time rather than having the whole picture at once. So, the question becomes how to keep your high agency even when situations are in flux.
I’ll cut to the chase and tell you what didn’t work: avoidance, wishful thinking that others would change, or coming in like a wrecking ball. Instead, having a positive impact started with recognizing the recurrence, taking intentional steps, and then course-correcting until all the pieces fell into place.
Let’s meet someone who used playmaker skills like courage, dedication, and being cool-headed under pressure to address a success-blocking pattern.
You might look at Steve Young’s NFL statistics—such as 3-time Super Bowl champion and MVP twice over—and think he’s bulletproof. But those accolades are only part of the story.
For decades, Young had a mysterious aversion to being away from home. He battled sleepless nights and declined invitations to stick with his routine.
After an incident where he went without sleep for 48 hours, Young sought help and was diagnosed with severe separation anxiety. It wasn’t his imagination—DNA drove the diagnosis. That’s when Steve put his quarterback training to work. He experimented and designed a personal playbook, transforming a secret into practical techniques to support his mental health.
Steve reflected, “I really do look at it simply as being lost in the woods when a park ranger comes by. Would you feel ashamed to ask him for directions? No—you’d be an idiot not to ask him. I want the same kind of experience for everyone as we make this less shameful. It would be foolish not to seek help for mental health.”
Like the case study, are you a pro at balancing keeping secrets with keeping up appearances? Then let me reassure you: Looking problems square in the eye may seem scary, but it’s one of the most high agency things you can do. What weakens your agency is using old-school maneuvers, like brushing off, covering up, or forcing what isn’t working.
Discerning a problem vs. a pattern can seem confusing. So, here’s the tell: Once or twice is a bad day. But something happening over and over? Yes—you have a bingo!
And if you’re concerned that addressing patterns makes you vulnerable, turn that mindset around. Declare that you’re self-aware, coachable, and desire continuous improvement. Managers and co-workers appreciate these traits, and they’re all marketable skills. Even more, your willingness to be authentic quietly sets the tone, making it safe for others to be genuine.
You don’t have to craft the picture-perfect answer—you simply need a willingness to dig in. Here are three ways to perfect your high agency:
Facing fears and challenges—even if you ease into it—keeps you at your strongest. So, take charge of a pattern that seems like it’s the boss of you and shift ambiguity into action.