Last week, my trigger finger needed a recall. I signed up for a conference and kept wanting to click “Reserve Spot” until I saw other incredible workshops during the same time slot. But then I thought, Wait a minute—I can’t be in three places at once, because physics!
Have you faced a similar problem where there were so many options that you didn’t know when to say yes or no? But let’s take it one step further: Is it really that you have so many good choices or are you trying to avoid the guilt-pang when you say no?
Saying yes to anything and everything will automatically put you in the overdrive vibe. So, instead of cringing, start thinking of no as a way of getting to your best yes. The yes where you’ve committed the best of your creativity. The yes that makes you look at a pile of work to be done and feel energized and inspired instead of crazy busy and stressed. And the situation that makes you want to share the news about what you’re up to—the “Hell, yes!”
Let me tell you how a friend learned how to finally skip the overdrive vibe.
My friend Joaquin laughed as I told him my tale of woe about too many choices and not enough eye-hand coordination. “Oh yeah—I used to double book myself ALL the time!” he said. “Big mistake!”
“That doesn’t sound like you—you’re always on top of things,” I said.
“Now, but five years ago, it was a completely different story. I saw any and every project that came my way as an opportunity, so I immediately said yes. But the opportunities weren’t on equal footing.”
“Like what?”
Joaquin rolled his eyes. “Some people thought they were further ahead than they were, so I accidentally said yes to a half-baked pitch. Other people focused on their visibility, so I didn’t realize I was saying yes to doing most of the work. I shake my head now thinking of all the things I said yes to. I learned there’s value in that yes, so I don’t easily give it away.”
In the March series, Work Worth Doing, we’re talking about how you can use soft skills to improve your productivity. Your unproductive days are easy to spot: They’re the ones where you feel overcommitted, under-appreciated, and burned out. So, before you rush to say yes, take a lesson from Joaquin’s bad experience and sketch out some go-to probing questions.
Once you have the full picture about a potential opportunity, turn to the soft skill of discernment to make the choice that’s right for you. And guess what? No is as valid as yes.
For instance, you can ask:
Here are three ways for you to practice:
Part of being productive is working on things you love. So, slow your roll and get the details you need so you can say yes to people and projects that light you up and no to spreading yourself too thin. Skip the overdrive vibe. That’s work worth doing!