Your intentions for 2018 have probably started taking shape. Before you rush into doing, let me ask you an important question: Are you sure you’re set up for success?

Having a big vision for the year is a wonderful start, but if you want to make 2018 the year your goals go from random thoughts or wishes to reality, aligning your inner and outer world is critical. That’s how you set intentions that resonate, the subject of the January series, My Soul Says Yes.

Getting aligned was a tough lesson for author and healer Denise Linn. It would be an understatement to say Denise grew up in hard circumstances. Her family constantly struggled to make ends meet. After her mentally ill mother was committed, Denise and her siblings were left with her abusive father. You could say that lack was a way of life in every area.

What she didn’t realize was that she took her childhood history into her marriage. As soon as she and her husband, David, had more than enough, Denise’s generosity would kick into overdrive. After all, prospering others is part of prosperity, right? Was someone moving into a new apartment? Of course, they would need pots and pans, and Denise was happy to empty her cupboard.

One day, David finally had enough. He said to her with complete love and total exasperation, “Denise, will you please stop this? We need more than one pot in the house!”

It’s a funny story with a serious message. It wasn’t that Denise couldn’t be happy until she owned a first-rate set of dishes. It was that she had become so good at struggling and living poor that she unintentionally kept reconstructing that lifestyle. Looking at her intentions list every day wouldn’t make much of a difference unless she stopped giving away her possessions. And she couldn’t take new actions until she changed the beliefs that drove them.

Denise started saying, “Yes,” to receiving good things and keeping them, and that was her turnaround moment. Over time, her self-esteem shifted as she became more confident with money. Her internal beliefs changed from, “I don’t know what to do with money,” or “Other people need help more than I do,” to “I can handle money,” and “I know how and when to bless others.”

Right now, your brain could be buzzing with all the practical things it will take to realize your goals. You need to take a class to learn a new skill. You should get out more and find like-minded people. You need to set up a routine where you can get some exercise every day and eat healthy food. To be fair, taking action is essential if you want to see your intentions come to life.

But here’s the insight you need to keep in the back of your mind: The results won’t stick around unless they line up with your core beliefs.

Your mind has a queue full of updates for the new year, ready to support your new goals and habits. Have you said “Accept” to the download?

Are you ready to conquer the world in 2018? Fantastic!

I just have one question for you as you head out the door. What’s for dinner?

You might think that’s a petty question, yet it’s exactly where we get off track. The little recurring problems are really important. They show us what’s blocking our way to achieving big dreams. Solving the blocks that are hiding in plain sight is one of the meaningful intentions we can have.

“What’s for dinner?” was a surprisingly complicated question for Kara and Steve. They thought their intention was simple: Healthy eating. Somehow, they never got there.

First, they were going to follow a special diet. But the restrictive list of foods coupled with their limited cooking skills made it impossible to manage.

Then they decided they would stop eating out every weekend. Dining out meant having drinks and appetizers at a local bar before moving on to a lavish meal. Although that plan was good on paper, they also wanted to see their friends.

Steve and Kara’s story applies to the way most of us start the year. We have a big, life-changing goal in mind, like flipping over our whole diet. But then reality kicks in. We start making little compromises. A load of bargains. Then we tell ourselves that hardly anyone has the outcome they want. And that’s how we get derailed by the end of January!

Let’s take a step back from the “what” of Steve and Kara’s story and think of the “why”. Eating well was just how the problem showed itself; the true issues were much deeper.

They really wanted to stop negotiating with each other during the drive home when they were both starving and irritable. They also wanted to have fun – with each other and their friends. Trying to have the cooking skills of a “Top Chef” contestant or accommodating a complicated diet every time they ate out was anything but fun.

In a sense, they wanted ease and connection. They ultimately got there through a combination of meal prep delivery, switching from pizza to salads to go, and an occasional splurge on the weekend. Practicing that kind of mindfulness has an inevitable ripple effect.

Before you produce a long list of intentions that will leave you shaking your head in a month, put the list in a drawer and sleep on it. The next day, think of the emotional satisfaction you’ll receive. That feeling is your true intention, the focus of the January series, My Soul Says Yes. Then take that feeling and plan what you’re going to do to put it into action.

For example, have you bought a shiny new planner because you’re trying to manage your time better? That’s a good start, but a meticulous schedule only works as a “what” if it supports more time available for the “why” – the people and activities you love.

This week, challenge yourself to go beyond a superficial goal and dig deep. Is the most important intention you’ll make this year hiding in plain sight?

Let’s run straight at the problem with the long list of goals you’ve started sketching out: They may not make you happy.

Setting intentions has become a little like giving a genie three wishes. On January 1, you think big, cross your fingers, and hope everything comes together.

Yet we all know how that works out!

An intention that can change your life – the one where you look back and say, “That year was the game changer for me” – has nothing to do with perfecting the more, more, more mentality. If your mindset is oriented around the chase for getting stuff or constant activity, you’re only going to be temporarily satisfied.

So, let’s start over and do something radical. Let’s look at “why” you’re setting the intention as well as “how” you’re going to get there this year. When the why, how and what are working together, you’ll have intentions that satisfy your soul, the theme of the January series, My Soul Says Yes. 

Jim Koch never planned to start a brewery. His father discouraged him from pursuing what had been the family business for six generations. He ensured him it was a miserable way to make a living.

Jim followed his father’s advice, earning an MBA and JD and working with important clients as a management consultant. And he was really good at it. But his life took a left turn when he asked himself some hard questions. He remembers thinking about his job at Boston Consulting Group: “Do I want to do this the rest of my life? The answer came back: No. The next sort of corollary to that was: Well, if I don’t want to do it for the rest of my life, I probably don’t want to do it tomorrow.”

On the surface, it may look like Jim Koch’s goal was to create a successful business. But founding Sam Adams was about more than the prestige of running his own shop. It brought him closer to what made his soul say yes, which was spending his days doing something he deeply cared about.

Jim’s dad was right – becoming a brewmaster is one of the hardest things Jim has ever done. He knows a lot about running a multi-million dollar company, yet over 30 years later, his takeaway advice isn’t about how to launch a blockbuster start-up. Instead, it’s about the art of being present and authentic, which can be the intentions of a lifetime. Jim counsels, “Leadership is more about living and modeling the behaviors and the values that you want people to embrace. The values you want to live have to come from your own living heart.”

Imagine yourself at the end of this year. What sounds better – a long list of stuff or being more aligned with your deepest values? As you’re toying with your list of 2018 intentions this week, draw two columns, separating the “what” from the “why”. Like Jim Koch, your why may change your life.