The holiday season has barely begun, but the calorie derby is in full swing. I’m already losing the battle with holiday cookie swap leftovers in the office kitchen!
It’s true—Delicious treats make it hard to maintain good habits. But as you look back over the year, have you experienced habit setbacks that are harder to discuss than sweets? And do feelings like anxiety or comparison make you inclined to brush mistakes under the rug? That’s an understandable reaction.
However, there’s a simple path out of that funk. Get back in the groove by repurposing the same soft skill behaviors you use to collaborate or be productive. Soft skills are one of the easiest ways to make changes because they empower you with practical, relatable techniques.
Let’s meet someone who transformed habit setbacks into “habit stacking,” a practice of reinforcing positive behaviors.
Travis Stolicker knew things had to change. He was heavier than he had ever been, health conditions had kicked in after neglecting his wellbeing, then two friends suddenly passed, leaving him re-evaluating everything.
He instinctively turned to his wife, but pulling on her as his sole support was rough on both of them. He remembered, “I really put the burden on her to solve my grief, and that was just totally unfair and put a strain on our marriage.”
One day, Travis heard about a 1-minute confidence booster: Make your bed. The idea was especially effective since he worked from home. He said, “No matter what you’ve done for the day, you can come back to your bed and know you accomplished something.”
Travis found ways to keep the momentum going, and a year later, he had dropped 40 pounds and quit alcohol, marijuana, and soda. But weight loss is only one aspect of the story. His version of “habit stacking” now centers around being a better parent and volunteering for local causes. He converted a personal crisis into a newfound purpose.
In the November series, Flip Your Failures with Soft Skills, we’re discussing how to put the soft skill How tactics you use every day to work to transform the ouch moments of 2023. Like the case study, you could feel you’ve been drifting after a supposed failure. But consider this: A letdown might be a turning point sending you in a better direction.
Perhaps you’re being redirected to a step-by-step overhaul, where you pursue a passion, build closer relationships, or simply take time for fun. Suddenly, disappointments become a powerful motivator to start habit stacking.
Let’s replay the case study for a moment to spark your thinking about how you could mirror the habit stacking technique. Can you spot the soft skills applied for success?
For instance, Travis:
* Employed self-awareness to understand eating and exercise habits that didn’t serve his best interests;
* Developed healthy self-esteem by starting small and being tenacious; and
* Took a creative approach to his journey, adding goals like meaningful relationships and techniques like journaling and reflection.
That short list shows why soft skills are so powerful. Everyone wants friends, colleagues, and community members with similar qualities.
Now, think of a single area where you feel stuck. State what is bothering you, then highlight soft skills—such as being self-aware, agile, or persistent—which will help transform that problem. That’s how you flip the failure into a positive learning and anchor wisdom for the future. You might say:
“This year, some positive habits drifted. In the future, I will:
* Take baby steps to get back on track;
* Show myself grace. I’m only human; and
* Keep investing in myself. Small changes are a force multiplier.”
The old way to boss up was to bootstrap your way out of disappointment. But it’s time to do away with that approach. In its place, end the year on a high note by habit stacking with soft skills.