Are you ready to kick 2020 to the curb? Join the club! But here’s some food for thought: Are you being specific about what you’d like to release? You’ll need to make that list and check it twice if you’re going to get the full benefit of good-bye.
Let me tell you how a famous actress put the soft skill of discernment to work. If she was going to let go, she was going to make it count.
As a former model and longtime actress, I thought looking flawless would be at the top of Andie MacDowell’s priority list. But in an interview with Off Camera, she laughed at the notion. She’s not only never been a perfect size 2—she doesn’t even want to try.
Learning to go with the flow extends to parenting, too. MacDowell grew up in a troubled home where keeping up appearances was the norm. However, she decided to build her family on a foundation of keeping it real. Any push for perfection went out the window when a therapist suggested, “If you do not forgive yourself, you will teach your children that they cannot make mistakes.”
In the December series, Thank You and Good Night, we’re talking through three simple questions: What do you want to cultivate, What would you like to release, and What do you want to re-engineer? Being a Soul Boss has two layers. In the external world, you act like the creative, wise CEO of your life. But the second layer is to ask if you’re being a good boss of you.
Think of it this way: Can you imagine suggesting to an employee that they hang on to old mistakes? Of course not! So, why manage yourself that way? The better choice is to recognize and then release those mistakes. That’s what Andie MacDowell discovered—the smart choice was to let some ways of thinking and acting fade into the past.
Confronting what you don’t like about yourself can feel painful, but there’s a huge upside. When you mindfully let go, you’re free to make space for new people, activities that make you feel fulfilled, and different opportunities.
So, let’s make it practical by finishing the sentence, “I’m ready to say good-bye to _____.” Here are a few ideas from prior posts to kickstart you:
*Name the Upset and say good-bye to old anger, resentment, bitterness, or pain. If you’re not quite ready to let that insult go, have a chat with your Christmas Future self. What will life look like in another year, two years, or five years, if you keep hanging on? Is it possible that you’ll look back and be surprised how something small became the boss of you?
*Bring the Whole You and say good-bye to trying to shrink—literally or figuratively—to fit someone else’s version of you. Your best self is your whole self.
*Say No to No Breaks and say good-bye to the mistake of pushing yourself far beyond your breaking point. 2020 has shown that sometimes life will feel like a difficult marathon. So, if you’re going to thrive, you need your mental, emotional, and physical body working in harmony.
T.D. Jakes said, “When you hold on to your history, you do so at the expense of your destiny.” Old habits, beliefs, and behaviors may have worked for certain situations, but your gut will tell you what needs to go, just like old tinsel on a dry Christmas tree. Package up what has served its purpose and say, “Thank you and good night.”