There’s a recurring theme for many new homeowners: Buyer’s remorse. Real estate ads featuring smiling, happy people seemed inviting, but those ads aren’t lining up with reality. The biggest common denominator for the 82% regretting their first home purchase was hidden costs. From homeowners’ association fees to routine maintenance to surprise expensive fixes, the struggle is real.
As I skimmed the article, it occurred to me that managing your career can be a lot like buying a property. You start with high expectations, make difficult trade-offs to close quickly, but might be disappointed when you realize real life isn’t quite like the promise.
At that point, you might think you only have one choice: Start chasing a new title, company, or manager. But hold up before you hustle. The moment you’re taking stock is the perfect time to stop struggling and stressing and show your career some love.
Let me tell you how a friend stopped chasing money and titles and built career success on a single watchword.
My friend Taylor describes their career in one word: Interesting.
When they graduated from law school, they were sure they had to work on Wall Street because big mergers and acquisitions were so interesting. But the stress and strain of 100-hour weeks almost put them in the hospital. So, when a client asked if they would ever consider being the General Counsel for their start-up, Taylor said, “Interesting.”
Three years later, the bad news was that the start-up had lost funding. But the good news was that Taylor stretched way beyond what they did on Wall Street. The challenge of wearing every hat—from finding content partners to negotiating building leases to closing sales—had enriched their resume.
When a cable network in Denver reached out, Taylor said yes. Denver is a long way from Wall Street, but it’s the most interesting choice they can make: The long hours are gone, they draw on every skill they’ve cultivated, and Taylor has time for their growing family.
Taylor summed it up this way, “I have to laugh when people ask about my master plan. The zigzags and hard knocks taught me to keep an open mind. I gave up chasing a single opportunity. What makes me happiest is chasing interesting work.”
In the February series, Three Ways to Practice Positive Attention, we’re talking about how to shift negative relationships patterns with soft skills. It’s easy to think the only path to success is to laser focus on a specific manager or company, then push until you get hired. But the trouble is that laser focus can quickly turn to tunnel vision, and tunnel vision is a closed, limited mindset—hardly the outcome you want!
Think back—were you ever so determined to land a job that you got stung by a hidden tax, like crazy hours? Did you overlook the nervous hiring manager pushing you to make a quick decision who became an exhausting micro-manager? Or do you wish you had pursued several roles at once, then made a final choice only after you had a chance to size up all of them?
You can avoid that buyer’s remorse by using the soft skills of creativity and discernment. Spend time envisioning where you want to go but leave a little room for your best thinking to improve. Here are three ways to start:
Treat your career like a treasured relationship. End the days of pushing, struggling, and striving, and give it positive attention.