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What I No Longer Want or Need

I admit – I had to read the product review twice. The tech journalist liked the device…just not enough to keep it. The final verdict? It wasn’t something they wanted or needed. After the test, it went straight back to the manufacturer.

The December series, Satisfied, is looking at the topic of surrender. When you hear “surrender,” what words or phrases spring to mind? Someone waving the white flag of surrender? Surrendering in defeat? Surrender as loss?

What if you could rejigger this idea so surrender wasn’t disempowering? Instead, imagine it just like the journalist: you see something for what it is, but gain satisfaction as you release what you do not want or need.

This is what happened for Cassie Young, an on-air host and social media director in Atlanta. She was thrilled to announce her engagement on Twitter. Things got interesting when a personal trainer reached out and offered to get her in shape before her wedding. He confidently declared he was worth every penny of his $75 an hour fee. Cassie thanked him for the note, but her reply was swift and clear: she was in shape.

The trainer refused to quit, sending one message after another. Cassie said, “If [he] had hit me up and said, ‘Hey, you know I can help you find the perfect balance in your life between being healthy, working out, and still having the life you love’…I probably would have been like, ‘All right, let’s see what you’ve got.’” Instead, none of his suggestions resonated with her, especially his final message that shame was a great motivator.

The personal trainer may have had plenty to say about Cassie’s waistline, but he didn’t see a critical component: her heart. You could say she surrendered trying to win the argument. However, she also released a less than view of herself, something she didn’t want or need. She ended their conversation with the hopeful statement, “I know I’ll look my best because I’ll be so happy I get to marry the man I love.”

Cassie Young’s experience is about much more than body image. It’s about self-confidence and perspective. Think back over this year. Do you have a similar story? When you use key Soul Boss principles like demonstrating courage and trusting your instincts, other people’s comments can’t become the boss of you. You’re able to release negativity before it takes root and say, “In the past, that really would have upset me. But not now. And not in the future. Thanks for the information, but I’m at peace with my choices.”

Being satisfied isn’t about ending the year with a million dollars or the love of your life. In fact, the reality of December may not bear any resemblance to the high hopes you had in January. Yet before you write this year off, take another look. Like Cassie, you might have achieved something you never set out to do – learning how to remain true to yourself, automatically creating space for people, places and things that are right for you.